separate ways

Council, that's what she needed. Council in a very specific form. A wisdom she could only glean from one person. And though their separation spanned millennia, conversations always seemed to continue precisely where they left off. She hoped her erstwhile master was where rumor placed him. Knowing him, it wouldn't surprise her to find that he was precisely where he meant to be, surrounded in knowledge per his voracious need for more. 

To Arlathan she traveled, a pilgrimage she took with eagerness since it's revitalization. There was an eerie sort of comfort in returning home. A home that, for all of its wonders and grandeur, was no longer a home to her. She'd served a purpose once and now she served another. One that drove her to often yearn for the confidence and security she'd once felt at his fingertips. Her blood rushed wild in her veins, excited anticipation thrumming throughout her body prompting a slight shiver despite her being sufficiently bundled against the elements. 

She found her way to the repository, faded memories assaulting her as she walked through familiar corridors. Yes, it was certainly alien this comfort she felt. They didn't belong. Arlathan didn't belong here anymore. But then who was she to cast such a disparaging opinion? Who was she put a rusted, forgotten cog in a once great wheel? 

Wordlessly she wandered, hands tied behind her back as she took in the forgotten home. Eventually she would wander enough to find her true destination although far be it from her to assume Faelyn wouldn't immediately sense her abundant enthusiasm at seeing him again. Quiet steps rounded the doorway as she stepped into the office proper. 

Some things never change. She found herself lamenting as she had so many times before. 

Aethra promptly focused, as if innately drawn, to a small orb set on a pedestal tucked onto one of the many shelves. The orb though initially unassuming, reflected light and shadow in an unnatural way. Many years ago, it had been her gift to him, a small reminder of her appreciation for his tutelage. She reached up to tap the orb softly, encouraging the enchantment inside to swirl at the apex of her touch. A wide smile wrinkled the corners of her eyes. No, I don't suppose they do. She murmured as if to herself.

Faelyn's routine hardly changed from the days of old, simply replacing lazy mornings with his husbands, their children, and their friends at the breakfast table with additional work. He'd been within the walls of the repository since before the dawn, gathering what he needed for the day, and doing some number of small things in his study, stepping out to secure breakfast, before slipping into a study down the hall to work the restoration tasks with Aeternis who he fed most mornings to ensure that they ate. Some things truly never changed. 

Thousands of years ago he made sure his apprentice of the age also ate, though meals then were taken with the family. She'd been family after all, though like the rest, Aethra he thought had been lost to him in the cruel stretches of time. And so it was that her mementos had joined the shelves, tucked in alongside his other children. A place in his heart where she belonged. 

Restoration work done for the day, Faelyn walked down the hall towards the open door of his study, his footsteps barely leaving any sound in their wake. He'd always been a quiet thing, in almost every conceivable manner. That was, unless an individual had taken the time to work past his walls. Then, it was getting him to shut up that was the real trick. When he found a topic to speak on, when he shared his exuberance on something, he could go back and forth for hours. 

Rounding the corner, he stopped in the doorway, leaning against the frame for support in a way, taking in the familiar form that played with the shadowed sphere she'd given him some thousands of years prior. It had been a priority of his, to track down various things from all of them, and so far, he'd been successful. That much he'd been lucky in. Well now. Either I've gone senile after all these years or the winds have finally blown a little will-o-wisp into my study. he stood properly then, opening his arms an his invitation to embrace her, a warm smile on his face. A father and me tor opening his arms to an adopted daughter.

There was radiant calm about this place, much in the way she remembered. A stark difference in her opinion to the reincarnated kingdom just outside. Perhaps that was unfair and rather premature of her but she couldn't find the room to care. In fact right now, she was here because she was so full to capacity of things weighing on her soul, she felt crippled. Historically there was only one way to ease that burden. 

Momentarily transfixed by the orb she'd gifted so many years ago, she disappeared into her thoughts. Being here made it hard not to remember the reasons why she loved coming to visit her mentor, the man that was more of a father to her than her own had ever been. Her eyes reflected the trick of light that the sphere manipulated as her fingers tapped on different points. It was like playing with something sentient, a favorite pet. She smiled fondly. She missed when things were this simple. Or perhaps she just missed the delusion that things were ever so simple. 

She spun at his words, whirling suddenly in a flurry of hair and skirts as she turned to meet his gaze. Soon after she was smiling brightly, eyes twinkling with true mirth. Can't it be both? I haven't been called that in hundreds of years. Less and less knew her as The Wisp by design. She was now known more for her current seat at the head of the Nero family. All part of her master plan. A plan she had shared with the elf in front of her when it was in it's rawest form of inception. Faelyn She crooned affectionately, wasting no more time by crossing over to him and folding into his arms. Her face nuzzled the same as it always did in a cradle of his blazed locks at his shoulder. She embraced him tight. 

I've missed you She murmured feeling a rather unexpected sting in her throat. She was usually so composed.

His smile lit up his usually so serious face. Aethra was little older than Eris, and no matter who had given birth to her, she would always be like a daughter to him. His arms wrapped around her in turn, lending her his strength as he chuckled at the age old joke, a hand coming up to rest against the back of her head. It seemed that it was now that everyone was rejoining his little part of the world, and it was just as well. He could hardly cope with another day without them all. As I've missed you, my dear girl. 

Faelyn held her for a long moment, as long as she needed, for in truth he needed just as long. It was a rare thing for him to cry, but there was a slight mist to his eyes when she did pull away. Look at you. You haven't aged a day. Would you rather sit in here or out in the greenhouse? It's a far cry from Silas', but still beautiful none the less.

He even smelled the same. Being in his arms was like traveling back in time, her own memories paling in comparison to this experience. At least now she would have something to revitalize those memories. She inhaled sharply at his words, letting out a shuttered sigh into his shoulder as she gripped him ever tighter. No one had called her 'dear girl' in a very long time. In fact, she could only remember one person who'd ever called her that and he was standing here now. 

Oh, She waved dismissively, wiping at her cheek when they pulled away, she smiled appreciatively. Still overly humble, why am I not surprised? Maybe it was a far cry from Silas' greenhouses but his had the distinct pleasure of being curated by his hand and to her that more precious than anything. The greenhouse. Did you ever manage to cultivate the Harlot's Blush? It was a rare bloom throughout Thedas but one she'd grown quite hopeful of seeing. Lead the way, Her fingers laced through his as she leaned over and pressed a chaste kiss to his cheek.

He did not offer his arm, or a hand, or anything else quite so gentlemanly. Instead his arm went around her shoulders, pulling her close to lead her from his study as if she were a kid again and neither of them were many thousands of years old. There is one, yes. Though I admit that I did not have much of a hand in it's creation. I helped them to draft a few plans during the reconstruction but... the repository is more my doing. I'm sure that Silas will have no end of ideas for it when he awakens, though.

Athera was led out into the greenhouse, the air thick with the scent of rare flowers, and those not so rare, in their spring blooms. Many of these were the very same that Cian had studied years ago, and now, so too would the young of this generation. He led her to a standing swing, settling them on it. It was a favorite place of his to sit and eat his lunch if he did not take it at his desk. Just across from the Harlot's Blush. Do you wish to speak of it, or let it be for the time being? Faelyn knew there had to be something on her mind for her to suddenly seek him out. He'd been awake for nearly four years, and it was not the best kept secret in the world that he existed within the walls of the repository.

When he pulled her close she beamed brighter than ever, cheeks flushing with excitement sparked with a tad of relief. She felt safe, complete, seen. There was much to discuss but she was rather content being in the moment and she knew he wasn't particular when she divulged or even if she got around to sharing the real reason why she'd shown up after all of these years. He always does. She looked around as they left the repository, admiring what he had a hand in reforming in the last three odd years. His dedication was vividly evident. 

Into the greenhouse they pathed, perfumed blooms tickling their every sense. She spotted the lone flower almost immediately, it being at the forefront of her thoughts for the moment. The dazzling blue petals displayed neatly at the crest of the stem, each one perfectly formed. Aethra leaned down to inhale the unusual flower. She straightened back to her full height, an entire inch above him. Nothing quite so substantial. Her expression turned solemn. How much do you know about Antivan politics? She ventured, diving straight into the deep end. Did he knew what she'd been up to in their separation? Did he know who she was? Catching his eye once more, she started to talk further into the greenhouse, attention on the floral residents.

Faelyn watched Aethra make her way through the flowers, and how his heart ached for her. He knew of what she had gotten herself into, the front she faced the public with, how he so desperately wished that he could protect her from all of it. It was what a father was supposed to do, was it not? Wasn't that what he had so desperately wished for growing up? He'd always known his father loved him, there was never a question of that. He'd even loved his step-son, Neil. But at the end of the day, theirs was a violent culture and no amount of love could truly protect him. 

Faelyn remained on his bench swing and watched. 

He watched a young woman who had trusted him so completely then, and trusted him now, go and sniff the flowers so familiar to her. No matter his opinions, he would do everything he could for her. That would never change. 

I know a good bit. But... there was a soft sigh. I think that what you need to hear right in this moment, is that no matter what you've done, or gotten yourself into, or are about to do... I will still love you, and support you. That is not to say that I won't listen and be your ears. But sometimes even the strongest of us need reminding from time to time.

She smiled fondly, true appreciation alighting to her features at his words. He'd always known what to say to put her at ease. Whether it was in the spirit of a father, brother or friend, he never missed. Though she smiled, her eyes turned sad, a far away expression about them that said more than she communicated aloud. I really missed you. She couldn't stress that enough and felt it bore repeating. But even with his encouragement, Aethra still turned and continued away from his bench to admire the other flowers, bending down occasionally to smell. 

Truthfully she was trying to find a way to frame her words in a way that made sense of the tumult roiling constantly in her mind. She was silent, save for the soft shuffle of her feet over the floor. I'm tired. she said almost absently, not looking at him as she continued to admire the curated flora. And I'm scared She finally admitted. Aethra was well aware that one of these days karma would find her and repay her for her meddling. She blinked a couple times, desperate to keep tears at bay as she delicately cupped one of the blooms in her hands to admire it closer.

He knew what it was to deflect away from the pain, and exactly how much it cost to admit to it all. He could feel the pain in the 'I missed you' and the loneliness that being so very old, and so very alone brought with it. He knew how awful things were for them all, even just in the sense of the world as it caved in around them, much less the heaviness that Athera had put herself into. For all that she had grown into a strong, powerful woman, and for all that he saw that in her, there was a young woman who lived in his memories, the things that he saw when he closed his eyes. Both the woman that stood before him, and the girl that he remembered, needed protecting. 

Faelyn stood from his swing and quietly made his way to her, his hand resting on the small of her back to let her know that he was there. I am too... and I have been for a very long time. And it's okay to feel that way... You don't have to be so strong and resilient all of the time. It had only been recently that he'd taken to admitting that was even something afoot in his world. It's okay to regret things, to wish they were different. Yes, you've made the decisions that you've made, no matter what they are. And in hindsight, maybe they weren't the best choices. Maybe if you could go back, you'd do something different. But would you, really? You've learned, you've grown... and I am so proud of you. Even if I am scared for you at the same time. I will always be proud of you.

They spoke two conversations. The one that anyone that chased upon them might hear and the one that went unsaid. It came from knowing someone for thousands of years to pick out the sub-conscience tells of their personality. Frankly put, there was a reason why she'd refrained from seeking out her mentor until now knowing she could always find him or simply make herself known to him. As she'd done neither of those things for the last decade, specifically since hearing of his mention in relationship with the awakened kingdom, there was certainly a considerable motive that was at play. 

She could never hide herself in front of Faelyn Korath. Not in any iteration of mystery tangible or otherwise. And for being who she was, that was terrible for business (and her reputation). 

But would he understand that? That she essentially blocked him out the only way she could? 

Standing up from where she bent to sniff the flower, she looked sidelong at him as he eased in beside her. After a moment, her expression reflected concern as she stepped into him. I'm scared because, she sighed woefully as she revisited what tormented her on a regular basis. Sometimes I don't feel anything any more, Faelyn, and I- she looked away with shame clipping her speech as her chin wobbled anew. When she'd composed herself, she sniffed loudly and turned back with a placid expression as she started moving again without mind if he followed and moved towards the next set of plantlings, feigning blank interest. Maybe this was a mistake.

Hie heart hurt to see the walls that she imposed with him and for the briefest of moments, that pain flashed across his face before it too, was gone. It did neither of them any good for her to see that. She had come to him in her time of need, not the other way around. 

Faelyn did not follow her deeper into the garden, simply remaining where he stood with a small frown on his face. He knew very well what she was doing, blocking things out so that she did not have to feel them. He was often guilty of the same thing. Athera Korath, do not walk away from me. There was no anger in his tone, only a firmness in that quiet voice.

Korath. Korath , like she was that stray all over again. Like she knew how she was nothing without him in her life. Like he was still just father. 

She froze. She'd never forgotten, so it was not a moment of realization. It was the mention aloud by someone other than herself. Her skirts swayed after she abruptly stopped. Her eyes closed before she turned to face him. Turned because even she couldn't make sense of the wave of emotion that overcame her in the single moment. Slowly she would turn, stopping only when she could truly acknowledge the overwhelming urge to crumble to pieces. 

Pulling in her lip, she attempted to look unaffected. That's not my name But instead what came out was the whispered rasp of her response. The words indeed of the child that wasn't a child any more and mourned that simple fact.

My girl, that will always be your name. No matter what you call yourself now, you will always be my daughter. he knew the weight of her grief in that moment, could see it in the cracks as she attempted to hide. You hide yourself away so that you do not have to feel your pain. And I see it. You are struggling. I can not bear your pain for you, though I wish that I could. But I can hold you and be here while you do. There had been a quiet promise so many, many years ago. That he would be there when he needed her. It had never been his intention to sleep for so long. He could not change that he had failed her in that. All he could do was to hold his arm out and silent ask that she come to him once more.

Herein lay the issue, the entire reason for her coming to him after all this time. That he would see her and parse through the bits that made up her rawest form filtering out the scrambled noises of her contaminated existence. She tilted her head at him like she was seeing him for the first time. Faelyn,

She shook her head and stepped forward to just inside his reach. I risk a lot coming here, exposing my roots like this. she doesn't shrink the space between them but instead continues. and I won't risk it for much longer... She grimaced. 

I just need you to tell me what you know about self introspection. because she was aware now of numerous versions of herself, their origins blending together near seamlessly. Some of them were aware and some of them were desperately in love with exactly the very last person they should. She looked into his eyes then, as close as they were though she might as well be miles apart the way she frozen rigid before him. An increasingly rising part of him also wanted to fall against him and let him fix it all. And assure you're not hurt to get to me. she shook her head there's no hiding.