dancing after dark

Eularia had no idea how to use a hammer. Well, she obviously knew the gist of using a hammer, but that didn't mean that she was going to use it with ease. No, she'd already hammered her fingers a handful of times, cursing under her breath, and quite thankful that the girls were at home with Magnus. She'd wanted to be without them for a bit... she'd said she was going on a walk. She suspected she'd been on her 'walk' for far too long. Because she heard footsteps on the ruined floor, and turned to look at the same time she swung the hammer. The nail bent sideways, trapping her thumb, which took the brunt of the hammers force.

Maker, dammit! She huffed and cursed herself, staring at her hand in defeat. She'd not gotten far, and it didn't look very good. But it'd felt good, to just be able to hit something without really worrying about destroying it. She sniffed, and by the time she's pulled her hand away from the piece of wood, and turned to see who had entered the ruined establishment, her eyes are filling with tears.

Seeing him—Magnus—seemed to be the thing that made her start crying; bawling as she brought her knees to her chest and buried her face in them. Don't-look-at-me. She ordered, like he's never seen her cry before (he's definitely seen her cry over stupid shit, lmao). Where's the girls? Was the next question to leave her mouth, even as she pressed the palms of her hands against her mouth, trying to muffle her sobs.

She wasn't crying over the damn nail. She's refused to cry about Frankie; deluded that the heart-in-a-box could understand her, that it beat differently when she sang to it, or spoke to it, or when she picked the glass case up and danced gently around the room with it. She refused to cry; like she refused to believe he was gone, despite having cremated his body herself...

Magnus walked over and sat next to her small body, wrapping his arms around her protectively with infinite understanding.  

[color=#7CD98A]"They're at home.  Enzo and Jaq came over."[/color]  His hand rubbed her back softly as it convulsed with the sobs that she'd never admit were for her late husband.  After a moment, he released his arms and his hands found hers, pulling her injured fingers to his lips for a kiss.  [color=#7CD98A]"They're safe, Lara."  [/color]

His eyes wandered to the nail she had been trying to pound in and then to her fingers.  [color=#7CD98A]"Clearly safer than you are, at the moment."[/color]  He lifted an eyebrow, [color=#7CD98A]"But hammers have been known to attack unsuspecting wanderers every now and again."[/color]  He kissed her fingers again, then tucked an errant strand of hair behind her ear.  [color=#7CD98A]"Have you decided to take up carpentry in your free time?"[/color]  The smile that accompanied the question was gentle, offering a transition away from the consuming grief she wasn't ready to let go of yet.  

He'd been there, before.  He knew how easy it was to cling to such things.  How necessary, sometimes.

Eularia frowned when he told her who had come to watch the girls, though it was hidden by her hands for the time being. At least they were safe. That was enough for the moment. Even if she didn't want that girl watching them.

Well... nobody was working. Because it was the middle of the night, but his question has pulled her from her sobs, though she hiccups a few times still. And it needs to get done. This place... this place was special. She'd danced her way around it with Frankie, she'd drank herself sick with Magnus...

He's there, his arms around her, and she adjusted how she sat so that she could snuggle into his side. But I need something to do now. I'm not a queen. I don't want... I don't want to be an assassin. She'd truly loved it; the thrill of the hunt, the chase, the kill.

What do I do when nothing I've been is enough anymore?

Magnus met her eyes, [color=#7CD98A]"You alone have always been and will always be enough."[/color]  The sincerity of the moment was intense until he let a playful smile spread across his face.  [color=#7CD98A]"If you want to be a carpenter, I'll buy you a hammer - one that doesn't attack you when you aren't expecting it."  [/color]

He kissed her fingers again, this time the gesture was filled with more adoration and appreciation than comfort.  

[color=#7CD98A]"This place will be back to its former glory in no time.  Most people won't even be able to tell the difference.  Antonio oversaw the work last time and it was...masterful."  [/color]

But I've not been just me in decades. Who am I? She'd been a wife, a mother, a queen, an assassin, a pet... a fugitive... But she'd never been just Eularia. And that bothered her. But then he's teasing her, promising to buy her a hammer that doesn't attack her, and she snorted.

But all of the memories we had here... She gestured to the mostly ruined building; a shell of what it once had been. ...they're gone. The building won't be the same. Even if it looks the same, it doesn't have the memories, and I can't make new ones. The unspoken 'with him' didn't leave her lips, even as she wiggled her fingers against Magnus' lips.

And I... what happens if I forget him? How could she forget a man when she had his heart on her mantel?

Magnus smiled.  [color=#7CD98A]"Darling, some things in life are too precious to ever be forgotten.  You'll remember it all.  And this place?  Your memories aren't tied to the ale-soaked wood or the grime on the floor...they're in here,"[/color] he said as he kissed her forehead,[color=#7CD98A] "and here,"[/color] and kissed the center of her chest where her heart was.  [color=#7CD98A]"They aren't going anywhere." [/color] 

He met her eyes again, his smile once again patient.  [color=#7CD98A]"This place has been rebuilt what, like three, four times now?  And you still remember.  You still love it for what it means, not what it is.  That won't change."  [/color]

[color=#7CD98A]"Like both of us, Lara, it is the soul of the place that matters.  The rest can be whatever it needs to be - even if it decides tomorrow to be a carpenter."  [/color]

Eularia sniffed at him, as he kissed her forehead, her chest. He was too charming; she was reminded of an earlier time, when she was but a girl and he but a boy. He'd made her feel at peace, then, too. Even as she learned to kill, practiced killing. But each time it was rebuilt, he was here to build memories with me. She murmured, reaching up to stroke her fingers against his cheek.

You're too good for me, you know? There's so much blood on my hands, Magnus. And... the only death I regret is his. Because it had not been her choice; she had loved him; she had hoped that he could come to understand her relationship with Magnus... that he might forgive her.

And at his final words, she rolled her eyes, and reached to wipe her face. So, you'll never die? She challenged him, with a playful smirk. I love you. Even if you did invite that girl to watch our children.

Magnus knew exactly what she meant.  He had plenty of blood on his own hands, but none of it had ever given him pause.  No...the only death that ever broke him was Zita's.  He hadn't committed the act, but he still bore the guilt from it.  

[color=#7CD98A]"The old memories are here...but they aren't all that is here.  There is life here, too.  We can honor the past and still cherish the present."[/color]  He stood up.  [color=#7CD98A]"I didn't know him well...but I know he loved you and he loved living vibrantly.  This is a place of music and dancing and laughter.  We remember him when we embrace the things he loved."[/color]  Magnus pulled Eularia to her feet and wrapped his arms around her, emphasizing the word embrace.  

He smiled and suddenly the space was filled with the sound of music from long ago - a song Frankie had favored about enjoying letting go of the day's worries and living each night to the fullest.  It was one of the first songs he'd ever heard Frankie perform.  

[color=#7CD98A]"He is still here, Lara,"[/color] Magnus said, touching her chest again, [color=#7CD98A]"and there are still memories to be made."[/color]  He pulled her back into his body, resting his forehead against hers as they began swaying gently with the flow of the music.

Eularia watched him as he stood, and for a moment, where she was beneath him on the ground, with the kindness of his words, the reason he spoke in her mind... She thought she might just worship this man, for as long as they both lived. And he pulled her to her feet, embracing her, and she buried her face against his shoulder.

He was a luxury, a comfort she did not deserve. She did not deserve such kindness from someone she loved, not after what she'd done. Some part of her must have wanted it, to have been compelled so easily...

As the song filled with music, the bustle of the tavern from ages ago, Eularia stiffened. And then Frankie's voice filled the space, and she relaxed. It was a memory from Magnus himself; but Eularia remembered the day like it was yesterday.

They'd loved to perform, traveling to their favorite tavern, performing song and dance together. He'd been more bard than prince, and it was a sweet escape for him to pull her into his antics. He'd been so... fun. So free. Even though she was ever-aware of the chains that bound the both of them. He'd still found a way to be free.

He'd shown that to her, repeatedly. Forcefully, at times. And she stood there, listening to the illusion, as she studied the man in front of her with tear-filled eyes. How many times did you watch? How often did I dance and sing with him, in front of you? She murmured, as he pulled her back into an embrace.

My mage in the shadows, she murmured, pressing a kiss to his cheek. She'd never realized he'd owned the tavern; she'd never realized he was there. She's never asked why. But he's shown his cards now... and she's a curious person.

Magnus smiled softly, the gentle love written in his expression making the tiny wrinkles at the corners of his eyes.  

[color=#7CD98A]"Enough to know you were happy and that you were safe."  [/color]Countless memories threatened to wash over him, but he let them slip away.  It had been hard watching her in Frankie's arms.  Heartbreaking.  But he'd promised to be what she needed...and at the time she needed him to not be there.  She had been truly and completely in love.  And to preserve that, he'd stayed hidden in the shadows.  

[color=#7CD98A]"I love you, Lara.  You deserve all the happiness this world has to offer and, at the time, me waltzing in would have fucked that up.  It was enough to just be near you, to keep you safe.  To keep you both safe."  [/color]

And he had.  He'd killed many an assassin intent on ending the reign of the Campanas.  The fact that he'd eventually failed in his efforts to protect Eularia and her heart was something he'd never forgive himself for.  It sat in a little box next to the final memories of Zita and the warning signs he'd missed just before.

His body began to move with the music...mirroring the steps Frankie had taken so long ago.  The motions were slow at first as he pulled E into the past. 

She'd said she didn't know who she was anymore, but it wasn't true.  She knew.  She was still the girl who longed to be free, to be wild and reckless and live without fear.  She was still there.  But years of responsibility, of worry, of grief had buried that girl.  

But she was still there.  She would always be there.  

Eularia was indomitable.

Eularia studied him, the way his age showed in the creases of his face. Neither of them looked their age; he had stopped his age earlier than she, and yet she has never asked if he chose to stop aging because of his first wife. For her, she had stopped aging after the death of her first husband and discovering her second husband.

She reached up with one hand, to cup his cheek. I'm sorry. It couldn't have been easy to watch her, head-over-heels with another man. It wasn't fair to him that he'd watched after her all these years. Just as it wasn't fair to Frankie that she'd fallen so hard for Magnus.

Life was full of unfair instances, she supposed. You're too good for me. He was not a good man, and she was not a good woman. But together, they were good for one another. And that mattered more than what everyone else in the world thought of them.

They were dancing, and the hand that caressed his cheek was pulled into hise, and she sighed, tilting her head foreward, until she rested her forehead against his chest. I love you. She sighed, and leaned into him, trusting him not to falter in his dance.

And I love our girls... I think I could love our life, too. She chewed her lip, [b]But perhaps Antiva no longer needs me.[/q] That was a lie; Antiva would need her as long as her children were seated on the throne, because her children would need her.

Even if three of the four hated her; and the fourth denied how much he hated her. Enzo could say what he wanted, but his mother refused to believe it was that uncomplex. Do you 'member, when we used to dream about getting out of Antiva? She met his gaze, curious. They had a home, the tavern, the girls, their friends and her relatives... but she couldn't help but wonder what it might be like elsewhere, despite her time in the Marches.

Magnus continued to move with the music, the motions fluid as if they'd been practiced a million times.  They just about had been.  

[color=#7CD98A]"There's nothing to be sorry for, love.  You were happy.  That was enough."[/color]  He gently kissed the top of her head and let the music wash over them.  For all his faults, Frankie had always been a magnificent bard. In a different life, perhaps that was all he had needed to be.  

[color=#7CD98A]"I remember.  We dreamed of a life free of chains and tethers.  We can have that still."[/color]  The fact that they had seemingly stumbled into the exact opposite of that life had not been lost on him.  But there was still time.  The future stretched out before them like an endless ocean, and when the time was right, they could adjust their sails and chart a new course.  There was nothing but possibilities in front of them.  

His hand found her chin and he tilted it up, so she was facing him, then leaned down and kissed her.  It wasn't an urgent kiss, but it was powerful.  It was the sort of kiss that muted the world around you as it swept up your heart and soul.  He pulled her into him with one hand, the other tangled in her hair.  When the kiss ended, he met her eyes. [color=#7CD98A] "I love you, Eularia.  I'll go on any adventure with you."  [/color]

And then he kissed her again.

She danced, and for a second, if she closed her eyes, she'd swear she was dancing with Francesco. But Magnus' hands didn't sit just so, they didn't feel just right. But it was enough. He kissed the top of her head, and she stared at his chest.

He tilted her face towards his, and kissed her. And it very quickly became obvious that they were not going to dance for too much longer. One of her hands gripped his shirt, ensuring he couldn't move too far out of her reach.

Tavern's not rebuilt yet. But... She was breathless, and he stole her breath again with another kiss. She shoved him backwards, both hands splayed across his chest, until they met a wall. The tavern was just bones, but at the moment...

Nothing but the man in front of her mattered. And she began to unbutton his shirt, taking a breath as they pulled apart.