Surprises for the future, memories from the past

Maeve stared at the wall in front of her, as she repeated the numbers in her head. It has been a couple of weeks since they attended the party, and the former bard had thought that her uneasiness, her queasy feelings were due over-drinking or eating foreign food, but this morning rearranging her belongings she had found the lines that she used for her monthly visitor

Who had not visited this month at all

The brunette hyperventilated as she looked at the linens on the floor, staring at them while looking as pale as she could be, too frozen to realise that her beloved was just at the door (something that in normal situations she would have noticed, rogue training and all). There was too much running through her head, on one hand she loved Lucien and trusted him with all her heart, on the other this seemed too similar to what her mother had gone through all these years ago.

Lucien had spent the morning quite busy, he'd had to get up earlier than usual to do a lecture at the University of Orlais, then he had a meeting with some colleagues. All in all he was in a decent mood by the time he got home though a bit ready for a nap.

As he walked through the estate he kept expecting to find Maeve already up and doing things, but so far, no Maeve. Eventually he found himself near the bedrooms, he wasn't sure what he'd been expecting to encounter, but whatever it was, it was not Maeve standing in the middle of the bedroom just staring. He walked towards her and waved his hand.

Hello? You look like, I don't know what but it's a bit creepy if I'm being honest.

Maeve was still doing math when her lover entered in the room, but snapped out of it at his voice. Suddenly she remembered that one time that she had not taken her potions; it had been a month and a half ago, when they had headed for a short trip to Jader and in the rush of the preparations she had forgotten them back at home.

And of course they had had sex, several times. How could have she forgotten that she had not taken her potions?

“The trip to Jader” she said out loud before sitting down in the floor and burying her face in her hands “I fucking forgot and now look!” she said signaling at the cloths that had not been used that month. “I should have known better, how did I forgot?” she could have offered a more detailed and clear explanation of what she was thinking, but Maeve found herself a little bit blocked at the moment.

Lucien wasn't totally naive, he knew how the birds and the bees worked and he knew enough about a woman's monthlies to have a basic understanding, but it wasn't something he really thought about much. He generally just figured it was all things that Maeve had under control. Granted, perhaps if he'd been more proactive himself about birth control, they wouldn't be in the position they were about to be in.

He tripped his head, a curious and slightly confused look on his face.

Trip to Jader? Forgot? Forgot what? I'm a bit lost...

“How can you not remember?!” Maeve threw at him one of the cushions that was on top of an armchair at her lover; in another moment, she would have not been this irrational but the current discovery was overriding the logical side of her brain.
She sat on the armchair, curling on herself “The last night we had sex and I forgot my potions because we were lost in the moment and… it’s not my fault okay? You could have reminded me too!” said Maeve before burying her face in her hands.
A thousand of feelings were blooming in her, and the most prominent was fear; what if Lucien abandoned her? What If her old enemies found her in a weakened state? There were methods to stop the situation, she knew that from talking bad in the old times with other bards but did she want that?

As she asked how he couldn't remember he was completely at a loss, he really had no idea what he was supposed to remember. Before he could say anything she continued to speak and some things started to light up in his brain. Though as hard as he tried to think about that night, he really thought she had taken her potion, or maybe he was just so used to her taking her potion he just assumed she had, it wasn't exactly like he could be trusted to think properly once certain body parts on him got excited. Then another thing dawned on him, why it was making her so upset.

Wait, are you saying that your, your uh...... pregnant?!

The brunette raised her head only to direct a glare at him; it wasn’t his fault that Maeve’s emotions were all over the place but she couldn’t help either the storm of feelings that were happening inside of her brain.

Maeve took a deep breath before looking down again, this was not the moment to panic, this was the moment to think. She nodded slowly as the different options and ideas arranged in her brain. Whenever she panicked what helped the most was to put everything in lists, while ignoring her feelings.

After pondering in silence, mostly blocking everything around her (not out of malice, she was just too stressed to process) she reduced the list to three options.

Maeve swallowed and looked at Lucien again “So, I guess it’s my time to make a choice huh?” because life had taught her to not take anything for granted, and her mother’s experience had taught her that even the person that was supposed to stand by you could have a change of heart under special circumstances.

Lucien's mind was spinning, this hadn't exactly been expected, but then he couldn't say that the idea of having a child with the woman he loved was all that terrible either, it was all just so, wholly unexpected. Part of him was actually rather happy with the news while another part of him was just downright terrified at the prospect of being someone's father, would he be a good father, would he be a terrible father, so many thoughts raced through his head.

Choices? Don't you mean we have choices, I mean, I'm the father, I'd like to think I have a say in things too... He wasn't even sure what the choices were since, in his mind he only saw one choice, and that was to be parents to their child when it came, what other choices could there possibly even be.

Maeve looked back at him, his voice penetrating the cloud of thoughts that were invading her “I…I am sorry I didn’t mean to make you feel left out” there was so much relief invading her mind that it shocked Maeve; even if she had been so vehemently planning about how to handle her future on her own if needed, knowing that Lucien was with her meant the world to the brunette. “It’s just that my father, when this happened ran away and I know that you are better than that but I didn’t want to get my hopes up about having your support…” the last part of the sentence was more babbled than anything else, as her brain found an outlet for the storm making her sob in a very undignified fashion.

She cleaned her cheeks with the pajama sleeve “Bloody hormones or whatever the fuck is this nonsense” said the brunette as she sniffled.

Lucien looked at her patiently, sure there was a part of him that was mildly freaking out, but he was quickly realising that the anxiety he was feeling towards the news was actually kind of a good thing.He'd lost so much to the LaRues, his family decimated, him and his sister the only surviving. The idea of having a kid of their own, of continuing the family name, it was like suddenly being given something you never imagined you'd want but finding out you actually want it quite badly.

I mean I'll admit, I'd never thought much before on where I'd stand on the topic, but it's here now and to be perfectly honest with you, I actually couldn't be happier. I mean it's crazy really but there it is. So fuck your dad, I'm not going anywhere now, nine months from now or nine years from now.

“I thought that I would never have family of my own, specially when I was in the worst of the barding fiasco” admitted Maeve quietly after hearing Lucien’s words “but I think that to raise a family with you, starting with this kid, sounds like the sort of happy ending that I always wanted but never expected” said Maeve with tears in her eyes before pressing a kiss to his lips

“So world prepare, there’s a little Beuvais-Valathrian coming in nine months from now” said Maeve before chuckling and pulling him into a hug, pressing him as close as she could.

It's good timing on me getting the estate back, I honestly don't want to think about how much harder it would have been when I was slumming it, at least now I can provide a good home for you and our child. Which, I realise it's not things you need, but we have it so no point in thinking about what would have been if we hadn't. It was utterly terrifying, even though a big part of him was happy, he was also just so terrified. What if he screwed up as a father, what if he hurt the baby, what if he lost the estate again, what if, what if, what if, what if, what if. He tried to clear his head but that was a tall order.

Well probably less than nine months, since you're probably already a few weeks on now, or is the nine month thing start from when you find out your pregnant, honestly I have no idea how female bits work. OK so he had a loose understanding of how some female bits worked, but definitely not the baby growing bits.

Any how, I was originally just coming in to tell you I have to head over to the University for a few hours and I'll be back before lunch....