An Old Friend Visits

Magnus stood on the crest of a small hill overlooking the shore and the sea beyond it.  He closed his eyes, drinking in the smell of salt in the air and the sound of water meeting land.  He'd slipped away from Antiva quietly, intent on ensuring the safety of those he considered important.  His home and business were left in the care of one of his pupils - one who had demonstrated that she was adept at making sure he wouldn't be missed.  

So it was with the assurance that all was well at home that he decided to detour to visit a....was friend the right word?   He was certainly more than an ally...but...friend?  That word had such entanglements attached. 

Magnus opened his eyes, the magic of the ocean lost to semantics.  Whatever Carasson was...Magnus found that he was eager to reestablish the connection. 

Perhaps it was that there were parts of Magnus that Cara just instinctually understood, perhaps it was that there were parts he'd never understand.  It didn't matter right now.  Whatever they were...they could continue being until such time as things had to change.  Then, like everything else, they would. 

So Magnus resumed his journey, alert to potential danger.  He tried to search his mind for any hint of what was to come, any insight as to how this visit would turn out  But there was nothing.  Those damn flashes of insight never seemed to call when beckoned.  He'd have to work on that. 

It was just after midday when he finally arrived at his destination.  He approached cautiously because he had come unannounced.  Cara might be a friend, but he wasn't a fool and he certainly wasn't harmless.

Since the tearing down of the Veil, nothing had been the same. Not for anyone but emphatically so for him. As a mage, communing with the Fade was a common experience. Hearing unexplained whispers, disembodied voices, that too was a common happening. But it was a rare thing indeed when he felt a shift in his core, an invasive sort of settling inside of him that worried him to the point of inaction. No matter that a diligent mage and First might want to do something about a posession but there was something about all of this that kept him from acting offensively. His legs were lead every time he was of the mind to do something about it, delve deeper. So he ignored it, hoping it would go away. 

Hoping in vain. 

There was nothing benevolent about what lurked just out of his notice. The only thing he could depend on was the noting of lapses of memory around certain triggers. Emotional triggers that left his vulnerable for attack. Certain people unfortunately, that rattled that fragile cage. Best he could hope to do to remain in tentative control was to remain calm, alone, away from anything that might incite the nameless spirit. 

It was a dismal existance, but a necessary one. That didn't mean however, he would chase away company when it landed quite literally on his doorstep. His eyes snapped up nano seconds before a knock rang against the shiplap. His nostrils flared for a moment, teetering on the edge of consideration before he snapped closed the tome open before him and stood. Whomever he was expecting when he opened the door, it certainly wasn't who now stood in proud, looming silence before him. 

Long way from home, eh Magnus? He smiled easily in greeting but did not move to let the other in just yet. He leaned against the door frame. To what do I owe this terrible inconvenience? The poke of his tongue in his cheek conveyed that his words weren't to be taken the way they might usually be intended.

[color=#7CD98A]"Well, it's lovely to see you too."[/color]   Magnus smiled as the door opened, lifting his eyebrows playfully as he carefully measured the man who opened the door.  [color=#7CD98A]"Y'know, just because you've decided to hide yourself away from the world doesn't mean I can't check in on you every now and again."  [/color]

Magnus held up a bottle of wine in each hand.  They were fine vintages that came highly recommended by the Mesoneros - who were certainly in the business of knowing such things.  [color=#7CD98A]"A bottle to enjoy now with me, a bottle to help you recover after I've gone?  Or perhaps you're too busy today and I should just come all the way from Antiva some other time.  It is, after all, just a short trek."[/color]  His smile turned, playfully transitioning to faux disappointment and sadness.  

He could feel something rebel in the back of his mind, a grumbling of pride at even the potential of being turned away after coming all this way, but he quieted it.  He had come unannounced and the trip hadn't truly been to visit Cara...that part had been improvisation.  Well, improvisation and good practice.  One could never let time erode the connections of the past...at least not the good ones.  

Honestly, he wasn't quite sure what had inspired him to head out this way...he only know that once the idea had taken root in his mind it was easier to just go along than try and fight it.  After all, he did loathe denying his urges. Delaying?  Yes, he could delay.  But outright deny...what was the fun in that.  I mean honestly, the life of a cloistered hermit might work for Cara...but he had a soulmate to protect.  

The smirk that played across his lips was hard to repress, though he tried. The result was a not nearly as foreboding as intended scowl, wobbling at the ends, lips curling inward to physically contain his mirth. The stance that might otherwise convey cool indifference as he leaned against the door frame, was instead bordering on comical as he fidgeted with where to put his hands so that he might seem as casually unmussed as he felt. Something about Magnus Rhysand almost always dapened his foul moods. The overly snarky git. 

You say 'hiding from the world' and I say 'finding purpose', not that I'd expect you to understand such a concept. He teased, eyes glittering with wicked mirth. 

He allowed the presentation of wine to break the thin layer of apprehension and doubt on either side. Next time, lead with that then you might receive a kinder welcome. He might've snatched one of the bottles were it not for his burgeoning good mood and his desire to keep his friend from lingering on his doorstep any longer. Instead he stepped aside, pulling the door open more, sweeping his arm inward in an invitational gesture. Do come in before you hurt yourself with that sarcasm. He rolled his eyes good naturedly. 

Should Magnus agree to come inside, Cara would shut the door firmly behind him, rounding back into view. Out for an afternoon stroll or did you jus miss me very much? He was quite content with neither of those possibilities as they were obscenely ridiculous. He started for a small cupboard, uncovering two goblets that would simply have to do for their impromptu revelry

[color=#7CD98A]"Hurt by sarcasm?  Surely such a lifelong companion would never wound me." [/color] The smile that spread across his face was full of delight as he gave Carasson a wink and entered.

[color=#7CD98A]"And as it turns out, I felt like I was due for a nice stretch of the legs and was in absolutely dire need of someone to profess their undying devotion to me through slurred words.  I figured the wine would help with the slurring and you could do the rest." [/color] 

Magnus found his way to a table and set the bottles down, waiting for Cara to provide the cups.  He dropped the pack from his shoulders to the ground and took a seat.  [color=#7CD98A]"Y'know...if you are searching for purpose, perhaps you could try looking in a few mice shops...that way, if you don't find a purpose, you might still come across something to make this place less dreary.  Unless this whole abnegation thing is your schtick.  Don't worry, though, I'm happy to accept your adoration and should you be so inclined, your affection, regardless of location.  Though...that could get awkward real quick."  [/color]

There was a gentleness behind his words that spoke to the history between the two, a sincerity that was uncommon to his current state.  He did his best to cover it, but it was there nonetheless.  He couldn't decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing...but that was probably something that would be determined by time.  

Right now, though, none of that mattered.  Today they were just going to have a good time.

Well if that was your motivation, I'm afraid we're going to need more than two bottles between us. Lucky for you, I never seem to lack supply. Only the best of the cheap stock for my good friend. He smiled all too wide for it to be a genuine statement with the twang of sarcasm that resounded. It would seem that they shared an equal affinity for more than just wine. Snide comments aside, Cara was all too pleased to encourage the other man, doing nothing to prevent him from slouching into a seat at the table as he continued dusting off some glasses. There was always a thin layer of dust in the form of sea brine over much of what he owned. He was used to it by now but if their wine tasted a bit salty he would hardly deign to explain himself. He set the cups between them, leather formed mugs, cured in a hard wax to keep from ruin when filled. 

Unparraled company and adoration is one thing, Magnus, he sat down catty-corner to his friend, the curve of the table separating them as he poured generous amount of one of the bottles between the pair of mugs. But if you want my affection I'm afraid you're going to have to do better than this. Perhaps start with telling me what you've been up to since last we met, hmm? How fares Her Royal Highness? Perhaps a low blow, forbidden territory as far as light and friendly conversation topics went. But he could barely stifle the curiosity stirred from the dark pit inside of him, the one warring for control of his faculties with renewed fervor day by day and craved chaos. Wanted to watch people squirm with discomfort around him. And Cara hated it. He tamped it down again, ignoring the pull towards chaos energy as he smiled genuinely at his long time friend. 

Don't you dare flatter me by saying I'm the only reason you traipsed into Ferelden. He took a deep swig from his wine, relishing the full bodied taste. He'd forgotten what good taste Magnus had in wines.

Magnus took a healthy drink from his cup.  Despite the hint of ocean salt, it was remarkably exquisite wine.  Jaq was right, it was one of their best.  

He gave a crooked smile at his friend as he set his cup down.  [color=#7CD98A]"Her Royal Highness?  She is well.  And royal.  Not sure about high, but I imagine she could remedy that should she so desire." [/color] He gave a dismissive shrug. [color=#7CD98A] "Politics are shit.  The world is spiraling into chaos.  Y'know the drill."  [/color]

He paused to take another drink.  

[color=#7CD98A]"As far as what I've been doing?  Well,"[/color]  again, a pause, this one deliciously full of anticipation, [color=#7CD98A]"I am helping all the good little children of Antiva reach their full potential."[/color] His delight erupted into a full smirk.  Of all the things he thought he'd become, a teacher wasn't one of them - and certainly not a teacher to the sort of people who wouldn't deign to speak to him back then. [color=#7CD98A]"Weirdest part about it - I'm not just good at it...I'm fucking fantastic.  Some days I can't even wrap my head around how much things have changed."  [/color]

He didn't mention the rest...the impending danger, the neverending battle that seemed to be tilting toward darkness.  Out here, on his own, Cara probably knew much better than he about the plague that seemed to be spreading.  The fact that Magnus had personally come to check on things spoke volumes to the gravity of the situation.  

[color=#7CD98A]"What about you?  Other than your impressive feats of interior decorating, what have you been up to?"[/color]

Afraid I do know the drill that is. He mumbled into his cup, an eyeroll joining his comment soon thereafter. Fucking smart ass. It was clear that aforementioned HRH was a non-starter, not today at least. Cara could certainly sense an artful deflection when he heard one and for Magnus he was quite willing to leave it alone. 

Moving on. 

They almost mirrored each other in the frequency at which they sipped from their glasses and soon enough, Cara was topping each off without another word about it. He wasn't necessarily surprised by this revelation. Magnus was an accomplished mage, one who rivaled and perhaps even eclipsed his own skill. He smiled broadly. It should be little surprise to anyone that knew him even in the slightest. And humble too, what a lovely example you'll set for your pupils. He bit back a laugh, biting down on the inside of his cheek as he busied his lips on his glass to keep from laughing outright lest Magnus think he wasn't being a supportive friend. 

But in all of this, the fact that his friend sidestepped his question was far from missed. However, in the spirit of leading by lovely example, Carasson considered Magnus' question before he doubled down on his own. Oh you know, he averted eye contact, now paying far more attention to the salt eroded wood grain of the table. Making sure everyone remains at their fullest potential. Forever chasing Chi and let's be honest here....Inala and Chip in equal respects. Ignoring the impending threat of darkspawn, hiding like cowards, almost killing Chip in the process...... yeah, the usual. 

Are you going to tell me why you avoided my question or are we just going to open another bottle? Because yes, something was definitely amiss if Magnus was all of the way out here. What's going on Magnus? he asked solemnly, smile now fully faded.

Magnus scrunched his nose a little bit as he considered answering the question honestly.  If anyone would understand how delicate the balance between okay and seriously fucked up was, it would be Cara.  

[color=#7CD98A]"Well, one:  I'm worried about you.  Shit is complicated, I get it.  But I know how easy it is get lost in your head and how hard it can be to climb back out.  And two?  Well, that's where things get even more complicated." [/color] He looked around the room as if to underscore the fact that the next bit of conversation was between them.  [color=#7CD98A]"E and I....well, we've reconnected.  But her husband is out there, somewhere.  From everything I've gathered...he's probably not going to be too keen on sharing - even if he's more than happy to walk away from her.  I get the impression he's the kind of man who doesn't want other people to enjoy things he thinks belong to him." [/color] 

Magnus stared at the liquid in his cup, waiting for a full beat while he decided if he should go on.  Finally, he looked up and met his friend's eyes.  [color=#7CD98A]"I just...am afraid something will happen to them, Cara."  [/color]

Them.

He knew it was coming. They could only small talk for long before the meaningful conversation started. He just hoped it wouldn't be his own problems up for overthinking. The last thing he truly wanted to do with his time was relive the details of the last several months. How he'd nearly killed Chip (although the man still maintained it was the work of a demon), Cara hadn't bought it for a second. Which meant that whatever this was inside of him meant to destroy everything good in his life. That much was painfully clear by now. 

But he no more wanted to discuss those painful musings than he wanted a sharp stick in the gut. He huffed woefully into his glass, trying his best to hide the annoyance on his features. Magnus was only trying to help after all. But he was soon relieved when the tone shifted and Magnus paused. Good. Moving on. 

He swallowed reverently, listening to his friend speak and confess his woes. It seemed wonderfully fitting for their current setting. Nothing like a heart to heart over good wine. Seemed wasted otherwise. The smile on his face when Magnus stopped speaking was apologetic more than one of pity. They knew each other too much for pity.  The best thing he could offer here was an open mind and maybe whatever bits of sage of advice he could summon. 

Reconnected. 

Interesting. That explained their previous back and forth on the matter. And you're willing to share with him? he mused, pausing only to top off each glass before reaching for the next bottle to consider the label. What has she said? Is she willing to share you What he left out was asking whether or not entertaining this romance was something the Queen wanted. He knew the risks of falling in love all too well. 

But when Magnus made that vulnerable admission, all bets were off. Cara frowned. Tell me what you need and I'll help in any way I can. he said softly. Especially if it involves more wine He said with a wry smile. He certainly had a healthy amount of sorrows of his own to drown.

Magnus noted the look of exhaustion that crossed his friend's face when the conversation turned more serious. He got it.  No one liked talking about things that were hopelessly complicated and rather, well, painful to face - but that didn't mean that they should be ignored.  If anything, those were the things that were the most important to share - because having someone to share the burden made the weight seem less...daunting?  overwhelming?  soul-crushing?  All of the above.  

He heard the questions and nodded as Cara asked if he would share with the king of Antiva.  [color=#7CD98A]"E isn't mine to own - so sharing her isn't my choice to make.  My options are to gratefully accept the part of her heart she can give or...or not. I've done not and frankly, it sucked.  I'm lucky to have a shot at standing in her sunshine again."[/color]  He gave a halfhearted shrug to downplay the depth of his next words.  [color=#7CD98A]"Besides, I love her.  I want her to be happy - and I don't know if she could be if she had to walk away from the feelings she has for him...or me. Making someone give up even a little bit of the kind of happiness possible isn't love, it's possession and control.  It's the antithesis of love."  [/color]

He couldn't imagine trying to cage Eularia like that.  It would require she be broken, that everything that made her alive be crushed and chained.  The thought was abhorrent to him.  The thought that Francisco may not feel the same made his stomach turn a little.  

When the second question came, Magnus reprimanded himself for not thinking of it sooner.  "As for her sharing me, I....honestly didn't stop to consider it.  I...got the impression that it would be less like a circle and more like a chain.  He isn't known for his diverse palate."  His mind raced through the possibilities at lightning speed.  "I don't know if she'd share...if it came down to it, maybe."

He let out an exasperated sigh.  [color=#7CD98A]"I guess I got lost in the worst-case scenarios."[/color]  He finished his wine and topped off both of the glasses in front of him, holding the bottle up for his friend to see the label. [color=#7CD98A]"And it will absolutely involve more wine - did I mention I work for them?  I figure having access to enough wine to drown my sorrows is a requirement considering politics are shit and I pretty much am in the thick of things.  As if things weren't complicated enough without the threat of political demise looming at all times."  
[/color]
He didn't mention that political demise was the same thing as death - that part went without saying.  

[color=#7CD98A]"How the fuck do you do it, Cara?  I know it isn't easy...but it's worth it, right?" [/color] He hadn't meant to ask the question and, in truth, wasn't sure if he wanted the answer.  But it was too late for that now.

It wasn't often that he could speak so candidly. Even more rare that he could commiserate to the extent he could with Magnus. They cut a disturbingly similar silhouette, the pair of them. Friends bonded by time and shared experiences and separated by physical distance still maintained their blunt sentimentality. They were far too much alike for their own good though it had only driven them further together thus far just as it sundered others apart without mercy. Somehow they made this mirrored co-op work. 

Cara understood, related with a depressingly similar experience. His first instinct however, was to roll his eyes and chuckle into his glass when his friend started to get poetic. Maker, you've gotten romantic haven't you? He nudged the other man's shin with the tip of his boot to accentuate his tease. Sounds like you have your answer. I suppose now it's just navigating this new reality of yours. Love her the way you do now if you think it's enough to withstand what you two have to face in order to keep her at your side. He'd never consider himself the romantic but he well understood the level and intensity of such a devotion. He felt it two-fold. Fortunately he wasn't the one who needed to agonize over sharing. 

He pushed his glass forward to be filled when Magnus raised the other bottle. The pair of them were known to put away obscene amounts of the stuff. A habit he didn't often get to indulge in anymore considering Xochipili's fragile resolve. Sometimes acknowledging the worst-case is the only way to discover the best case. It's a balancing act is all. 

How very masochistic of you Magnus. He would said it was more trouble than it was worth but he didn't believe it himself and Magnus wasn't here for that kind of encouragement. I think you have to answer that question yourself. Is she worth it? But like his first conundrum, it seemed like an obvious answer. Of course she was worth it. They were all worth it. 

Moreover, what makes you think I'm the authority on any of this? He cocked his head to the side in question, his eyes lightening up again with teasing mirth. He sighed. We'll need a third bottle at this rate

Magnus laughed and shook his head.  [color=#7CD98A]"An authority?  Gods, no.  Experienced?  Yeah.  I figure if anything, you could regale me with horror stories to serve as cautionary tales."[/color]  They both had their fair share of horror stories; no one really wanted to rehash them all. 

As a transition, Magnus leaned over and reached into his bag, pulling another bottle out.  [color=#7CD98A]"Luckily for you, I travel heavy."  
[/color]
He settled back in his chair.  [color=#7CD98A]"Now, and not to change the subject, I need some actual help on something.  I mentioned being a teacher." [/color] He held up the glass, referencing the earlier nod to the wine label.  [color=#7CD98A]"One of the kids is good...serious potential.  But damn, he needs to be knocked down a peg or two.  Keeps thinking that he can wield the power of his name but doesn't even begin to understand how to play the game."[/color]  He smiled again. [color=#7CD98A] "Remember that time Janus came into the bar thinking his shit didn't stink and old Mav just knocked the wind out of his sails with a few words?  How'd you like to play Mav for me?"  [/color]

If that's just your way of telling me I'm old I would like to remind you of your age my friend. He finished what was left in his glass. He knew the intended sentiment but he'd never once let a good opportunity pass no matter how unlike himself he'd been lately. But as long as we can agree that I'm just about as ill-equipped as you then we have an accord. Ask and you shall receive but you may soon regret asking me that. Maybe he was being overly dramatic and maybe he was right on the nose. Love was the battlefield with an unforgiving cruelty in the form of lust fueled desperation. They were all fools for it one way or the other. 

Oh no, not my favorite subject. He rolled his eyes, pushing his glass to be filled by the last of the second bottle before topping it off with the third. He leaned back in his chair, a mischievous smirk coloring his features as he looked across at his friend. He was grinning like a jackal by the time he finished his proposition. Oh you know me far too well for our own good. He spun the glass mindlessly Tell me more and precisely how many pegs he needs to be lowered. I need to know how much Mav to channel. Are we talking existential crisis? Or just a good ribbing?

Magnus had a devilish look in his eyes as he topped off Cara's glass.

[color=#7CD98A]"Not existential crisis - but rather a lesson on diplomacy that doesn't come at the end of a blade.  Kid's supposed to become a talon - but if he doesn't learn how to maneuver people then he's just gonna end up a pile of bones.  Power on the battlefield doesn't make someone a good leader, that's up here."[/color]  He tapped his temple.

[color=#7CD98A]"And maker, does the kid love sticking his foot in his mouth.  I swear, once he realizes he's in a hole, sometimes he grabs a shovel and starts digging." [/color] He shook his head and smiled. [color=#7CD98A] "Not that you've ever had any experience with people like that."[/color]