The stress and panic that had begun to bubble their way to the surface subsided, when Nairn kindly agreed to retrieve the sought after item, and deftly did so. When it was nestled into his trembling hands, Haulean hugged it to him and closed his eyes, murmuring a soft word of thanks. Being able to hold the last gift his mother had ever given him meant so very much to the grieving boy, even if he didn't yet know what was inside.
When asked his mother's name, the petite youth hesitated a bit. But. At Nairn's further explanation, he felt himself inwardly relenting. This was Nairn... the one person he trusted more than anybody else in the world, apart from his mother. Not to say he didn't trust anybody else, because there was also Meg who was like a second mother to him. And of course, Colt. They were his family, too. And now that his mother was gone... he had to work harder to ensure that he remained useful and wanted.
Sniffling softly, Haulean leaned his head against Nairn's shoulder, and let his trembling fingers tug at the cording around the envelope. "L-Leilani." he said ohhhh so softly. "She... she used to w-work at the R-Rose." he took a shaky, hesitant breath, then, knowing he was opening up a big jar of worms with this topic. "Did... did you know her?"
It wouldn't have been all that surprising. The Blooming Rose, aka 'The Rose', was basically the brothel, in Kirkwall. Leilani had been there long before Haulean was born. And, if distant memory served, he had seen Nairn in there, when he was too small to really register. At least... he thought he had. In passing, maybe, when he was scurrying about and finding little nooks and crannies to hide in. Haulean never know whom, in particular, visited his mother, because she didn't talk about such things in front of him, and always made sure to keep him well clear of her 'work'.
Finally, his shaking hands freed the envelope, and he opened it up, working at tugging free the thick sheaf of papers... a lot of which looked... old. Tattered. Letters? The topmost one was fresh, and dated the day before his birthday. When he tugged it all free, something clattered to the floor, sparkling in the dim firelight. Bleary eyes tracked the small object, and welled with fresh tears upon seeing that it was his mother's favorite ring. Supposedly, it had been a gift from his father. With another sniffle, Haulean picked it up and clutched it tightly. He didn't yet have the courage to read what had been written.
But the first page read:
"My Haulean. My little Golden Light.
If you are reading this, then I have left this world. I know how much your sweet and loving heart hurts right now, but know that I am still with you. I will watch over you, always, ma nehn, and you are not alone. You have a family with you, already, to help pick you back up and help you through this somber chapter. More of one than you realize, though I know that you have already begun to put the pieces together, you clever boy. Though I would never give you a direct answer, before, I feel it is time; the answer is yes. The man you speak of so often in your visits is your father. I have always known. And you, da'len, puzzled it out much quicker than I had anticipated. I never told you, because we had both agreed it was safer if neither of you knew one another; that is why he did not know you. That is why your name sparked no recognition. That is why I made you promise to keep his true name, my name, and the surname I gave you locked away in your heart, where no one would ever hear them. But now, you have my blessing to make yourself truly known to him. I am gone, now, and you will need each other more than ever. I have enclosed proof enough, should he require it, but I very much doubt that such will be needed, if he is the man I know him to be. I spoke the truth, when I said that he is a good man, with a good heart, and that he cared for you more than you know. May you forgive me, for keeping the whole truth from you, and may he forgive me for not telling him that you were in his care until now. Promise me that you will continue to be the shining golden light, for which you were named. Promise me that you will live your life to the fullest, and let light and happiness in, even in your darkest hour. There is always a glimmer to be found, if you only look for it. I love you more than there are stars in the sky.
With all of my heart and soul,
your Mamae"
The rest were all older letters. Some, unsent ones addressed to his father, with the use of his given name. These were little accounts of Haulean's early years, such as his first words, when he learned to walk, etc. All of the little things she'd wished to be able to tell him, but knew she couldn't. Even one that was written when she knew she had fallen ill, and was worrying about what to do for their child, should something happen to her. Always she would close it with her love, and the reassurance that she was simply getting things off of her chest, rather than writing with the intent to send. It was almost like a diary. There were other letters from his father. Some from long before Haulean had been born or conceived. There were even pressed flowers between some of the pages. Clearly, these had all been kept with the utmost care and love.
When asked his mother's name, the petite youth hesitated a bit. But. At Nairn's further explanation, he felt himself inwardly relenting. This was Nairn... the one person he trusted more than anybody else in the world, apart from his mother. Not to say he didn't trust anybody else, because there was also Meg who was like a second mother to him. And of course, Colt. They were his family, too. And now that his mother was gone... he had to work harder to ensure that he remained useful and wanted.
Sniffling softly, Haulean leaned his head against Nairn's shoulder, and let his trembling fingers tug at the cording around the envelope. "L-Leilani." he said ohhhh so softly. "She... she used to w-work at the R-Rose." he took a shaky, hesitant breath, then, knowing he was opening up a big jar of worms with this topic. "Did... did you know her?"
It wouldn't have been all that surprising. The Blooming Rose, aka 'The Rose', was basically the brothel, in Kirkwall. Leilani had been there long before Haulean was born. And, if distant memory served, he had seen Nairn in there, when he was too small to really register. At least... he thought he had. In passing, maybe, when he was scurrying about and finding little nooks and crannies to hide in. Haulean never know whom, in particular, visited his mother, because she didn't talk about such things in front of him, and always made sure to keep him well clear of her 'work'.
Finally, his shaking hands freed the envelope, and he opened it up, working at tugging free the thick sheaf of papers... a lot of which looked... old. Tattered. Letters? The topmost one was fresh, and dated the day before his birthday. When he tugged it all free, something clattered to the floor, sparkling in the dim firelight. Bleary eyes tracked the small object, and welled with fresh tears upon seeing that it was his mother's favorite ring. Supposedly, it had been a gift from his father. With another sniffle, Haulean picked it up and clutched it tightly. He didn't yet have the courage to read what had been written.
But the first page read:
"My Haulean. My little Golden Light.
If you are reading this, then I have left this world. I know how much your sweet and loving heart hurts right now, but know that I am still with you. I will watch over you, always, ma nehn, and you are not alone. You have a family with you, already, to help pick you back up and help you through this somber chapter. More of one than you realize, though I know that you have already begun to put the pieces together, you clever boy. Though I would never give you a direct answer, before, I feel it is time; the answer is yes. The man you speak of so often in your visits is your father. I have always known. And you, da'len, puzzled it out much quicker than I had anticipated. I never told you, because we had both agreed it was safer if neither of you knew one another; that is why he did not know you. That is why your name sparked no recognition. That is why I made you promise to keep his true name, my name, and the surname I gave you locked away in your heart, where no one would ever hear them. But now, you have my blessing to make yourself truly known to him. I am gone, now, and you will need each other more than ever. I have enclosed proof enough, should he require it, but I very much doubt that such will be needed, if he is the man I know him to be. I spoke the truth, when I said that he is a good man, with a good heart, and that he cared for you more than you know. May you forgive me, for keeping the whole truth from you, and may he forgive me for not telling him that you were in his care until now. Promise me that you will continue to be the shining golden light, for which you were named. Promise me that you will live your life to the fullest, and let light and happiness in, even in your darkest hour. There is always a glimmer to be found, if you only look for it. I love you more than there are stars in the sky.
With all of my heart and soul,
your Mamae"
The rest were all older letters. Some, unsent ones addressed to his father, with the use of his given name. These were little accounts of Haulean's early years, such as his first words, when he learned to walk, etc. All of the little things she'd wished to be able to tell him, but knew she couldn't. Even one that was written when she knew she had fallen ill, and was worrying about what to do for their child, should something happen to her. Always she would close it with her love, and the reassurance that she was simply getting things off of her chest, rather than writing with the intent to send. It was almost like a diary. There were other letters from his father. Some from long before Haulean had been born or conceived. There were even pressed flowers between some of the pages. Clearly, these had all been kept with the utmost care and love.
04-07-2024, 12:37 PM
